Twirling

DO you ever have those days where you feel like your life is just twirling? Like, you don't hear conversations going on around you, you're all twirling inside with frustrations over this or that? There are some days of the week (more than not) that I feel like I'm twirling. I'm sure this is induced from stress of being a mom to a rambunctious 17 month old boy.

I have learned that no matter how much discipline Chris and I give Coleman, he's still going to follow through on his boyish impulses and smack some other little kid in the face, throw toys, throw food, or bite me on the shoulder as he's cuddling with me. As Chris likes to say, as he's reassuring me that I'm not a complete failure of a mom, "We are not doing anything wrong! He's going to learn over time and with experience about behavior. Kids don't just "know" behavior." Today, for instance, little nursery children were being shuffled single file across the hall to another room. Coleman, being in close proximity to the children, (he plays with a toy kitchen set that's always in the hall near nursery) proceeds to run and body slam an older, but helpless, little boy. That little boy got up before I could run and help. He growled at Coleman. Then they were joined by another boy and a few girls in a riot over the kitchen set. Yup. An all out freak out session. There was no more single file. No more folded arms. And Coleman was beyond reproach. He clung to the kitchen set with his life! The other children were quickly shuffled to the classroom and I was left in the hall with my head twirling over the behavior of my son. My emotions had had it! A few moments later we were headed back to the kitchen set, only to see the nursery door open. Coleman hurried to the room and...I saw it coming...he smacked a little girl right in the face! I grabbed him, and sternly gave him the verbal reprimand of a lifetime. He continued to cry until church was over because of one thing or another. I was twirling inside and Coleman was tired, ornery, and in trouble!

There is no time to stop when you're a parent. No breathers, no kick-your-legs-up moments. It's like you have to constantly be on guard. You do the best you can day in and day out, but sometimes it just feels futile! I wonder if my child will ever learn to control his impulses. My advice to myself is...don't give him time to do those things. Keep him busy. Keep him occupied and happy. I have to say that it does work...most of the time! When we are twirling in playtime with each other, running outside after a ball, or playing with cars I notice a happier and less agressive boy. He even seems to communicate with me better. We twirl to music all the time and he laughs out loud. It's great. Although hard and exhausting, the busy moments make being a mom worth it to me, because I see my son happy and carefree. And sorry to all the moms whose children Coleman may body slam or bite in the future. *Shrug* It's not because he's malicious, or because I lack parenting skills (I hope). We're all just learning and twirling in this parenting bubble.